Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione.

I froze. I goddamn froze. For like at least forty seconds which is a long damn time in a play. I don't understand. I just couldn't get the lines to come and since I was focussing on recalling the lines, I couldn't think of anything clever to advance the plot. I haven't missed a single line in rehearsals, and tonight I freeze. I suck so bad. I embarassed myself. I embarassed my other actors, and sadly most of all I embarassed our director. She did a great job and was always prepared. I blew it for her. I made it seem that she didn't adequately prepare us, but she did. I told her in the beginning that I had difficulty memorizing lines, but I had them memorized. I had it down, but instead of performing excellently, I let her down. I am such a screw up. I can't act.  One of the directors said "it happens to the best of us." No it doesn't. It doesn't happen to the best, that's why they're the best. I can't believe it.